the dugong, a cross between a humanatee and a vacuum cleaner.
The vacuumammal (Dugong dugong of family dugongidae) is more than just a repetitive name and a vacuum-shaped maw; like their cousins the humanatees, dugongs belong to the order Sirenia, so named beacuse they were frequently mistaken for mermaids, sirens of the deep ocean. Indeed, the word “dugong” comes from the tagalog word meaning “lady of the sea.” Unlike the lithesome mermaids, however, these animals are also known as “sea cows,” perhaps so named by their disgruntled sons-in law. Fair warning boys: this may be what your darlings mermaids grow into as they age. Less learned but more abundant than the humanatees, vacuummamals are not currently listed as endangered, but are widely protected in habitat areas.
* the author submits that this particular dugong looks a bit like an overgrown button mushroom…
